Nearly 10,000 of the funniest jokes online now!
home | categories | a to z browse | search | random joke | submit joke | contact us
JOKES

SEARCH ::

Find:


Viewing Joke:

Category:Farmer jokes
Date Added:10/10/2007
Rating:not yet rated     
Views:1036
 
Joke:A lone tourist who is passing through the suburbs on the way to town by car, unfortunately experiences mechanical problems with the automobile. The car stalls and the tourist parks the car by the side of the road and waits for help. Not much later, a farmer happens to pass by with a truck full of farm animals. The farmer offers the tourist a lift to town and proceeds to explain that he is bringing his farm animals to the town market, where they will be auctioned off to the highest bidders. Well, it so happens that on the way to the town, the farmer being so engrossed in his story, unintentionally wanders into the other side of road where another vehicle is approaching in the other direction. The farmer realizes his absent mindness and attempts to avoid the possible collision with the other vehicle. He just misses the other car, but unfortunately crashes the truck into the side of the road. The tourist winds up thrown into a ditch and suffers broken ribs and a broken arm and leg and is obviously in extreme pain. The farm animals are all messed up very badly and the farmer, although remaining inside the vehicle, still suffers cuts and scrapes. The farmer gets out of the truck and looks at his farm animals. The chickens all have broken limbs and can barely move. "These chickens are all useless! Nobody will want to buy these chickens anymore!" bellows the farmer. With that, he grabs and loads his shotgun and blows away the chickens. Next, he sees the pigs and they are all lame and bleeding profusely. "These pigs are all worthless now! Ill get nothing for them!" yells the farmer. With great rage, the farmer reloads his shotgun and blows away the pigs. The farmer looks at the sheep and they all have broken limbs and their wool is all bloodied. "Worthless sheep!" screams the farmer and wit h that, he reloads his shotgun and blows away the sheep. Meanwhile, the injured tourist witnesses all of this carnage in great horror. The farmer then moves over to the side of the ditch and looks at the tourist. "Are you okay down there?" asked the farmer. "NEVER FELT BETTER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!!!" the tourist yelled back.
 


More Farmer Jokes:

1.   Category: Farmer jokes  0 stars
Camp Woodland was across the road from a dairy farm. One day the kids saw a large bull.Is that bull safe? someone asked... more

2.   Category: Farmer jokes  0 stars
A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster disappeared und... more

3.   Category: Farmer jokes  0 stars
Q: When is a farmer like a magician?A: When he turns his cow to pasture.... more

4.   Category: Farmer jokes  0 stars
What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? Wheres my tractor!... more

5.   Category: Farmer jokes  0 stars
A farmer gets sent to jail, and his wife is trying to hold the farm together until her husband can get out. Shes not, ho... more

6.   Category: Farmer jokes  0 stars
What do you call an Arab dairy farmer? A milk sheik.... more

7.   Category: Farmer jokes  1 stars
Liam had left Dublin to go up to Belfast for a bit of skydiving, Late Sunday evening he was found in tree by a farmer. W... more

8.   Category: Farmer jokes  0 stars
A lone tourist who is passing through the suburbs on the way to town by car, unfortunately experiences mechanical proble... more

9.   Category: Farmer jokes  0 stars
A mans car stalled on a country road one morning. When the man got out to fix it, a cow came along and stopped beside hi... more

10.   Category: Farmer jokes  0 stars
What did the farmer say when his fat pig wouldnt fit into the pen? "Theres more there than meets the sty."... more



home | categories | a to z browse | search | random joke | submit joke | contact us | link partners